Believe it or not, I did that on my rather spooky horse, Shazaam. Then we'd go for a sedate walk around the round pen. I already knew that this particular horse had a horrible trot and my new Quiet TB Maximus had a decent trot so when it came time for me to re-learn to trot, I chose him for the job. I did do some trotting on Shazaam and found that I immediately tensed up and while Shazaam put up with my tense body, Maximus has the quality of being naturally tolerant of people and their blunders.
So I progressed to trotting in a larger arena on Maximus and becoming relaxed about it. It's important to understand that I have always had the ability to ride the trot from about age 6 but I find fear paralyzes a person and nullifies training.
I found that when I got on a horse, it took me between 10-20 minutes to relax and the more a rode, the less time it took.
On the last day that I had my horses at the training barn, the trainer insisted I get on Phantom in the round pen before I took my horses home. I had some minor apprehension about this but it went away as I walked my little guy around at the walk. He was a bit stiff necked but the trainer was of the opinion that if I ignored the behavior, that it would go away with time. Then the trainer instructed me to trot my horse. I squeezed gently and I don't think anyone really knows what I did wrong but Phantom took off in a blind panic in the round pen.
I tried within the first couple of strides to turn him but no luck. I heard the trainer tell me to sit up and not think about anything but riding the horse. So I did. He tripped at speed and I leaned back a bit to help him recover his feet. He ran another 2 laps around before he calmed enough to realize that I was giving him a rein cue- he tipped his nose and stepped under himself in the rear and my wild ride came to an end.
I *think* I squeezed him too long. I was waiting for a trot, preparing to go with him and it never came. I think I was a little apprehensive and when he took off, the fear overrode my body and I had to wait longer than anyone would like for my brain to kick in so I could breathe and relax my seat. After I relaxed, I sat fine and could easily pick up lost stirrups.
There was a BBQ going on at the barn (right outside the round pen!)so I had many many spectators! They all applauded me and said I sat that ride like a Pro! Then I was offered a stiff drink. I was mortified, and went off to ride my trusty calm TB Maximus. I trotted him in the arena and thought for sure that cantering him might even be fun...but I didn't.
So I moved all my horses closer to home after training. Now I have to ride alone- which is scary. I have 3 days a week off to work them and I can work one horse a day during the work week which means they get worked 4 days a week on average.
Since I moved my horses and gave them time to acclimate to their new place and new routine, I find I have regressed in some of my fears. They get less work and less turnout (although I really try to make sure they get as much as I can give them) and so they are a tad hotter than I like. Well, not the TB, hot for him is looking half animated at the trot. If he is excited to leave his corral and actually picks up his feet, that's something.
I know how to move forward again from here with my fear and it probably won't take me as long to get back to where I was as long as I don't do anything stupid to wreck my confidence.
My riding instructor gets back from her month off on vacation in another week or so and then I'll have an appointment with a person to ride and home work which will give me the motivation I need to push and expand my confort zones.
Here is me riding Phantom just before he bolted blindly:
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Here is me riding Maximus afterward- I look ok even though I never took that drink!:
11 comments:
Hey, bolting is SCARY. I have been there! I think you'll find that it really helps to talk about everything and work it out on your blog. At least you have one really nice quiet broke one to be your confidence builder - that helps, too!
Good for you for having a plan and working through your issues. I have to start back up with a horse I love who scares me. I'll be blogging that too. My blogs so far have been more focused on laziness, time management and pain... time to add FEAR, LOL. We can give each other kudos and support.
Good on you for getting back at it! You and Fugly seem to share an aversion to helmets. While I think it's within every adult's right to choose, I do find that a helmet makes me braver. I often ride without one, but when I suspect that things could go wrong (crossing the train tracks, brides on the highway, out with new horses...) I plop mine on as a physical and mental insurance. Makes a huge difference to me, probably because I no longer hear the voice of my eventing coach hounding me.
This all sounds very familiar. I rode when I was younger, got back into it in my 30s, got first horse at 35, then another and then another. That makes three horses, none of them suitable for a beginner, which is what I realised I am after common sense and logic returned. So, what to do? Learn, that's what, it's been 3 years and counting. I still have those 3 horses and always will but we won't be out competing at anything any time soon. I've got help from professional, sane, calm, experienced people and I am determined that these horses WILL NOT be worse off for having been lumped with me as an owner, it's just going to take me a lot longer than it would take an experienced person is all.
So, right now I'm looking at a re-start with a 13 yr old TB mare who had serious trust issues (they're getting better) and who could blame her, she was a broodmare and some asshat really gave her a hard time. A re-start with a 5 yr old TBxAndy who I've had since he was a two year old, I made the mistake of sending him off to be started before he was ready (sound familiar?) and am determined to make amends. My other 'little' challenge is a 3yr old American Saddlebred filly with a whole heap of attitude. She's been with me since she was 14 months and hasn't been started under saddle yet, she was completely unhandled when I got her and we're getting there slowly.
You probably have cramps from laughing at me, I know, I'm an idiot but hey, I'm a determined idiot!
Hey, you've come a long way baby! I remember the days of coaxing you into the saddle on Trickster, and now you are comfortable enough to ride Maximus after having your bell rung, GOOD JOB!! Of course it helps that "Wild" Colt I raised loves you to no end. I am really excited about starting our lessons this week! Trickster can't wait to see you!
Hey, looking forward to following your blog. I like your description of taking things one step at a time and not going any further until you don't feel any anxiety. I too fear bolting, especially in areas with low tree branches, many obstacles, sketchy fencing, nearby traffic or unforgiving hard ground. I am a helmet wearer, and I am seriously considering purchasing one of those cross country vests before starting my youngster.
Your horses are quite lovely by the way, and it sounds like they are also very lucky to be in your care. I hope I can find good training help if/when I need it. It was good to see the comments on here about waiting longer to send youngsters off to a trainer.
Thanks for sharing your process!
HEY LADY!!!! Awsome Job Sat Morning!! Now get rid of them boots so we can keep up the progress!
PS. Arena starts going in on monday, next week we will have a real one to ride in!
Great job & congratulations. You seem to be working through the godforsaken fear. It's got to be the worst emotion there (except maybe grief). Looking forward to more posts.
Have you been riding? Inquiring minds want to know =)
I guess I will have let the inquiring minds know what is up! She is taking lessons and progressing very well in her equitation, strenth, balance, and feel. I think riding my lesson horse is giving her the confience to really ride and not worry so much, I am REALLY REALLY proud of her progress and we are in fact going to work with Maximus tonight!
Oh, very good news!
Thanks for the update WM.
Hope all goes well with Maximus. I expect it will =)
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